If You Like Piña Coladas

I hope you're well. I know that life can be a lot right now. And with so many troubling and head-spinning things happening in the world, it’s easy to feel kind of trapped in worry, the heaviness of it all, or the stories we keep telling ourselves. So, if you're feeling that way: You're not the only one ❤️

Here’s a seemingly random fact about me: the first 45 single I ever bought was Escape (The Piña Colada Song) by Rupert Holmes. Why did 8-year-old me make this choice? I'm not entirely sure. I didn't know what the song was really about, I had never had a piña colada ~ all I know is: I liked it.

And why am I telling you about this today? I promise, it will make sense in a moment or two!

If you haven’t heard The Piña Colada Song (or haven’t thought about it in a while), here’s the general idea:

A man feels stuck in his relationship and reads a personal ad from a woman who likes piña coladas and getting caught in the rain (among other things). He responds to the ad and invites her to meet him at a bar, and when she walks in ~ it's his "own lovely lady". And he says, "I never knew ~ that you liked piña coladas!"

It's a catchy song about feeling stuck and wanting to escape. And it seems kind of superficial at first. But it's also about how escape isn't always what we need to get unstuck. What we need is often right where we are; we just aren't able to see it for what it is.

Have you had an experience like this? Maybe not involving piña coladas, but where you were convinced you needed to “get away” from a situation where you felt stuck, and later realized what actually needed to shift was the story you were telling yourself about it?

When I feel stuck, it’s often because of the ideas I have about who I am, what’s possible, or about the person or situation in front of me. Based on those ideas, I can start imagining that big things need to change. And don't get me wrong, sometimes big change is exactly what a person needs ~ I mean, I did leave a career as an editor to become a therapist and self-compassion teacher!

But most of the time, what I really need is to slow down, see more clearly and listen more closely. Stuckness is usually a sign that something important is hiding in plain sight.

That’s my takeaway from The Piña Colada Song, and it's also why I love the poetic passage below ~ both remind me to return to the present when my mind wants to run toward an escape. This poetic passage also helps me pause long enough to question the story I’m telling myself ~ and see if there’s another perspective that's truer and more helpful:

Always we hope
by Lao Tzu

Always we hope someone else has the answer, some other place will be better, some other time, it will turn out.

This is it.

No one else has the answer, no other place will be better, and it has already turned out.

At the center of your being, you have the answer; you know who you are and you know what you want.

There is no need to run outside for better seeing. Nor to peer from a window.

Rather abide at the center of your being: for the more you leave it,
the less you learn.

Search your heart and see the way to do is to be.

❤️

I hope you find this poem supportive, too. If you'd like to practice with it a bit more, put a hand on your heart and take three breaths.
With each inhale, say to yourself: At the center of my being
With each exhale, say: I have the answer
When you finish, notice how you feel.

Wishing you an easeful end of the week (and if you like piña coladas, maybe one of those, too) 🍹