Compassion at Costco

August tends to be hot and slow in the Northern Hemisphere. It’s the month I most associate with that song from Porgy & Bess: “Summertime (and the livin’ is easy).” Of course, I know the livin’ isn’t exactly easy right now ~ summertime or not!

Last weekend I was reminded of how challenged many of us feel right now, and of how the stories we tell ourselves shape how we understand ourselves and each other.

My husband and I were in Costco and I saw a guy coming toward us with a flatbed cart piled high with stuff. It was so full that as he cut us off so he could get to the snack aisle first, a few items fell onto the floor.

He was pretty abrupt in how he cut us off, and I will admit that I had some judgy thoughts ~ he seemed pretty entitled. And I felt disrespected.

My husband said in my ear, “That was kinda rude.”

I didn’t think much else of it until a little while later, when we passed the guy again, and I felt the judgy thoughts come back.

And then I noticed that he was off to the side of an aisle, with items scattered around him and piled on the cart. He kept looking at his phone, and then back at all the stuff.

I could see that he was beyond stressed out.

And I was trying to understand ~ what’s up with this guy? What’s going on?

And suddenly I got it.

I thought to myself, “He wasn’t acting entitled. I bet he’s doing an Instacart delivery! Shopping for someone else and feeling overwhelmed by the massive size of the order, combined with whatever time pressure he’s under for the delivery window.”

I exhaled and immediately felt less tense. My shoulders dropped, and the judgy thoughts evaporated. I could feel tears in my eyes.

I had no idea what his story was, but I do understand what it’s like to feel overwhelmed, trying to keep track of it all, and feeling the relentless pressure that is life in 2026.

I put a hand on my heart and sent him supportive energy.

This perspective shift helped me feel more connected to the world around me. And also aware of how hard it is to be human sometimes, and how so many of us feel impossibly overwhelmed.

I had planned to share a different poem today, but as I wrote about this experience, I realized there was one that fits better with what I just described:

Compassion
by Miller Williams

Have compassion for everyone you meet,

even if they don't want it. What seems conceit,

bad manners, or cynicism is always a sign

of things no ears have heard, no eyes have seen.

You do not know what wars are going on

down there where the spirit meets the bone.

And whenever I share this poem, I always include this self-compassion version, too:

Have compassion for yourself,

even if you don't want it. What seems conceit,

bad manners, or cynicism is always a sign

of things no ears have heard, no eyes have seen.

You do not know what wars are going on down there where the spirit meets the bone.

I include that second version because there’s a lot going on for all of us. It can be easy to lose sight of how human we all are. And how much we carry without knowing it.

Our feelings and the things we do make sense, even when we don’t understand right away.

Just like how at first I misread the guy at Costco. But when I slowed down and really looked, I could see his humanness much more clearly.

I bet if you could slow down and really see yourself, a similar thing would happen ❤️

Sending supportive energy your way 🌻